And Then I Forgot

Okay. So. I'm sitting here trying to edit and make my thesis sound like someone might actually want to read it. Like there might be something interesting in it somewhere. It's not going well, I only have about an hour and a half left before I have to leave the library and there's a strange man sitting behind me reading numbers out of the phone book and a baby crying loudly somewhere to my right.

All of a sudden I remembered that I had to write this blog. I wondered, "Do I have to post one this week?" "When is it due?" "Good thing I remembered!" "I didn't get my invitation" Oh yeah. It was in my other email where everything gets lost. Luckily I thought to check. Then I tried to accept the invitation. IMPOSSIBLE! I don't know what was going on. I have an account. I've had an account for awhile. I posted last semester. But for some reason it would NOT let me in. I reset my password, closed and reopened my browser, signed into my account, tried again, and then magically I'm got in.

So what are my anxieties? Forgetting about this blog every week. Oh, and trying to write something interesting in my thesis.

But seriously. I was worried about not having enough prep time. I'm still worried about that honestly. I'm worried about not sleeping enough. Also still a worry. I'm also worried, like Emily, that my students will be more on the ball than I am right now because I just have other things going on. Luckily my students don't want to talk, and don't read, so I'm not having too much of a problem looking more prepared than they are. It's not hard when they just stare at you as if you're an alien from outer space. I am also worried about grading because it's hard to know what to give students. Some of that fear was erased when I sat down and actually started grading this weekend. It was pretty obvious who had read and who had not. The reading responses were also pretty obvious. The students are trying, but they need some guidance.

Most of my fears were erased on the second day when they weren't more prepared than me, and stared at me. I called my father (a teacher for almost 30 years) and told him their reaction to my feeble attempts at creating a discussion. He laughed for quite awhile. It's good to know every teacher knows what it's like to feel like an alien in front of a class of students.

So on to the third class tomorrow. I had a little bit more time this weekend to prepare, so we'll see how it goes. Here's to being a devil!

Now, after this short break, which was longer than I had planned, back to my head-into-a-brick-wall thesis. Whoopee!